Ezra Ayokanmi Emmanuel
Some people have this annoying tendency to support evil or bad behaviour because of peer or group pressure. This is a very terrible thing to do. The term that describes such people is enabling. Enablers are, generally speaking, akin to hypocrites. Most enablers are inconsistent and unreliable people with no defined ideal that they prop their lives on.
The Assistant views encouraging bad behaviour from the angle of Reinforcement which involves ‘rewarding or promoting that bad behaviour’. Going further, it describes enabling as ‘provoding support that allows the behaviour to continue’. Nova Sharp believes that the word ‘ENABLER is not intense enough for what such people are doing to the people they allow to continue in their bad behaviour’. Bad behaviour is a corrosive disease that requires cauterisation as quickly as possible to stop it developing into a malignant cancer.
The point been stressed is while bad behaviour is of itself terrible, more terrible is allowing and encouraging such behaviour to persist. People who engage in antisocial behaviour, as a general rule, should be circumspect about it. They only become brazen when emboldened by the encouragement they receive from sources where they ought to have been checked. For instance, a child that is recalcitrant from infanthood but receives pampering instead of reprimand would most likely develop into an adult bully or worse.
In relationships, one of the greatest red flags is abuse. In most cases, desperation to settle down makes people in relationships endure abuse. Enabling this kind of behaviour ultimately spells doom for such a toxic relationship. According to Sara Lynette, ‘some individuals do not even realise they are enabling someone else’s behaviour’. This is often the problem in relationships: burying heads in the sand like the ostrich and hope the problem goes away. The consequences of not confronting the problem head on can be devastating down the line. As with parenting so it is with conduct in romantic relationships. Bad behaviour of any sort should not be condoned at any point and must be met with punitive and corrective action immediately.
In some instances, curbing the bad behaviour of people requires specialised help. It is not in every case that self help can be beneficial or appropriate. People who are into drugs and such dangerous living may require much more definitive help than someone who is slovenly and lazy depending on the individual. Again, a person given to abusive behaviour would require a more intricate psychological analysis than a person who smokes. The different areas of bad conduct and behaviour require different approaches to deal with them. The given of the entire scenario is that the person living with such a condition requires help of an external nature.
In the context of the larger society, the people of a geographical setting have a lot of work to do in ensuring that those who run their affairs do so with their firm focus on the Commonwealth. The powerful have been known to behave and conduct themselves atrociously. From avarice, to reducing life to the level of brutishness, nastiness and brevity as described by the philosopher, Thomas Hobbes, political leaders need to be put in constant check by the people.
The question of the moral standing of society must weigh heavily in the consideration when choosing those to lead a people. The various sociological processes of training from the neophyte stage through to leadership must align with the communal norms of behaviour. Behavioural scientists such as Laurie Santos, who’s works on Cognitive Biases and Well-being as well as Annie Duke, who delves into the area of Decision Making, explore the multidimensional behavioural patterns of man in the community. The morality question, as dissected by these and other behavioural scientists, is at the heart of conduct in any community of men.
It goes without saying that compatriots have a role to play in ensuring that demagogues such as Adolf Hitler, Benito Mussolini, Joseph Stalin, Mobutu Seseseko and the rest are not allowed to come to power.
Equally important is society’s role in ensuring that children imbibe the correct human behavioural qualities. Parents who fail to train their children do incalculable harm to the society. Such children grow up to be fraudsters, drug addicts, robbers, corrupt government officials, corrupt leaders, kidnappers, terrorists and religious extremists. The consequences of not nurturing children in the right way is what is playing out in the world system in our day.
The bottom line is we as members and stakeholders in this generation have to work hard at ensuring that our legacy improves the world. Much of the toxicity in the world today stem from the obnoxious behaviour of its present day inhabitants. Unfortunately, we have largely morphed into a phalanx of enablers of bad behaviour and terrible conduct. The consequences are staring us in the face and living with us. We are less secure, less healthy, less happy and very unfulfilled. The time to do a one eighty degree turn around is now in order to salvage what is left for the generation to succeed us.